The past few weeks

It's been a while since I have blogged. Sometimes I feel I don't have much to blog, but then so many things happen, and I just get kinda lazy to type it up! But here are a few things we have done in the past few weeks. I hadn't posted pictures from Diego's b-day celebration.

My husband and I put together a "clown" theme. He cut out a clown made out of wood and I painted it. All the decorations were very colorful, so I was happy with the end result.

my sister Jolene made this sign.





my parents took Diego a teddy bear along with some white balloons which we let go.

My other sister Emma and her family brought a very cute baby duck flower arrangement

I didn't have the time to make him his b-day cake to take on the day of his celebration . Last year and this year we ordered a flower cake WHICH I TOTALLY FORGOT TO TAKE A PICTURE OF!!!DUH! but since it was his b-day month, I still ended up doing it for him that way it would last the entire month.





when we were up at the cemetery, Erik read out a beautiful poem to his little brother as well.
Will need to post the video later.

Then we sang happy b-day and released the balloons up in the air with a song that reminds me of Diego.






The rest of the weeks in bullets.

Valentines Day
My husband gave me flowers and we went to an early dinner because it was a Saturday and we figured all restaurants would be packed. So we decided to go as a family. There was a new Chinese buffet that opened up by our house, so we decided to try it out. I must say we have had better buffets in the past. But at least we tried it. After that we went to 31 Flavors and got some yummy ice cream.

During that week Adam got a little sick. He had a bit of a fever and his chest was really congested. So I decided to take him into urgent care. Here are the boys while waiting for the doctor. in spite of Adam not feeling too well, he still managed to smile at the camera. Have I mentioned he loves the camera??!!





last weekend my family came over for a get together and we had some yummy food. Since it was a last minute plan, I didn't get the chance to make anything so my husband and I decided to order food. It was quite tastey.

The next morning, my sister Jolene came over for breakfast. It was suppose to be her and her husband Gerric, but poor Gerric was sick in bed. We owe you breakfast Gerric!!

This past week Erik made his first reconciliation. We had been practicing the past few weeks. He said he was a bit nervous. The service was actually very nice. I didn't think pictures would be allowed but everyone was taking pictures, so I took out my camera too! Here is Erik coming out of the confession room.




The FIRST thing he told me was "mommy I wasn't nervous!!" He was so proud of himself as was I.
Then we went to different stations as a family where I washed his hands in Holy water and my husband read out a verse to him. It was all just very nice.









Erik asked my sister Jolene to be his 1st communion God mother . She happily accepted.



She is already his Baptism Godmother, but HE chose her again. God willing he will do his 1st communion in May. He still has yet to ask the Godfather. Hmm.. I wonder who that will be? :)

In other news: Adam turned 14 months on the 21st of Feb. and I had forgotten to mention that he is now drinking from a sippee cup. We have weened him off the bottle. He's been off the bottle for about 2 months now! Only ONCE in a while I will give it to him at night in case he is having trouble to go to sleep. but the majority of the time, he drinks from a sippee cup or out of a straw. and since he started taking steps since before his 1st b-day. He is just all over the place now, walking and running..

and Erik for the longest time we have had the hardest time to get him to sleep in his own room THE WHOLE NIGHT. He always comes to our bedroom at different times, but for a whole week, he has been sleeping in his own bed, in his own room the ENTIRE NIGHT. that is big, trust me!!

My friend from New Jersey whom I met online through Diego's website. She came down a few months ago to San Diego, however we didn't get the chance to meet. But we met online because unfortuneately, we share the same pain. Well she is pregnant. Due in Sep 2009. So good luck to her!! My prayers are with her as I understand her fear.

Henry's MRI is also Next week (3/4/09). He is constantly in my prayers. God willing it will be a clean MRI.

My older sister also started her own blog! check it out when you have a moment. and if you are a lurker, please comment! I would like to see how many people read my blog. thanks!

Today my poor little Erik stayed home from school.
He had a fever so didn't get him to school so that he could get some rest.

sorry for the long post, but I thought I didn't have much to write but it looks like I did!

Happy Heavenly Birthday Diego!

Happy 2nd birthday baby.

wow.. 2 years ago I woke up in the middle of the night not feeling you. I went to the hospital thinking I was overreacting. Daddy stayed at home with your big brother because I figured I was going straight to the office from there. I still have his text message on my phone asking me how me and you were doing at the hospital. As soon as I got his text message was when I called him and told him that I was told you "may have left us". He immediatly took your brother to grandma "mom" and came to the hospital. He arrived, then shortly after "mita" showed up too. Then the ultrasound technician showed up to do the ultrasound and deliver the horrible news. That was when we just became "numb". What was suppose to be my last day at work before going on maternity leave, turned out to be a "bereavement leave" .I had NO idea that we would come back home to an empty crib and a destroyed heart. Daddy and I held you in our arms. As painful as it was to let you go, I wish I could go back to see you and hold you one more time. I regret so many things that I didn't get to do with you in the short time we met and said good-bye. I was in shock and not thinking. I didn't want your brother or cousins to see you. The only ones that met you were your grandparents, aunts Emma "mita" and Jolene, your uncle Gerric and daddy and me of course. Some of the other family members didn't see you. I guess I just wanted everyone to remember you in a special way. I didn't want them to see you lifeless and cold. But at least your big brother got to see you for 5 minutes at the funeral home when I dressed you because HE asked to see "the angel". I DON'T know what I was thinking and I regret not taking pictures with you. The only pictures I have of you are the ones from the hospital which we put in your website. I see other websites where parents along with other family members post pictures of them holding their stillborn baby. For me, pictures are suppose to be happy moments. That day was and will forever be the most painful day of my life. Nobody knows how I feel. I don't even know if you even know either. I guess only another mother that has been thru the same knows that ugly pain. Some people think it's something that it's done and over. It's not. It's a BIG hole in my heart. Part of me has been buried with you. I still cry for you, I still yearn for you, I still wonder what you'd look like now and most of all I still wonder why you left us. Why didn't God give us the opportunity to be together as a family. I know things happen for a reason which only God knows. If you wouldn't have left, maybe your brother Adam wouldn't be here. I can't imagine life without him either. But I want my 3 boys here with daddy and me. That completes our family. I just want you to know that I LOVE you so much and continue to miss you EVERY-SINGLE-DAY. I know you are constantly watching over us. Sleep peacefully baby. Until we meet again.

p.s. I hope the balloons that we released somehow reached you. Did you feel the love? I sure did. And I know you were proud and honored to have your big brother Erik read you that beautiful poem.

Go on and have fun at your birthday party honey. Watch out, the terrible two's have just begun. :)

I LOVE YOU.